I first saw you in 2005 at the Tennessee Partners training. I remember being in tears when you played your Disability is Natural DVD. It made me realize just how much I saw my son, Ryan, as someone who "can't" instead of someone who "CAN." That was the last time I hung around in the "can't camp." That weekend my heart took the lead, instead of my fearful mind, and since then I've watched Ryan  succed in school, Cub Scouts, church, and other community events. A drive was set forth that weekend that hasn't stopped since. Granted, I've had times of discouragement and fear, but that drive eventually jumps in and takes over.

The best way I could explain what that drive is is a rebirth of how I felt when I first heard the words, "He has autism." A death occured then—my dreams and hopes for my son died and all I could see was autism rather than Ryan. After Partners, though, I began to see that original boy come back to life. I began to see in my mind that it was possible for him to do the things every child enjoys doing, and that just because he HAD autism didn't mean he WAS autism. That, coupled with a mama bear's instinct, is what that drive now is.

Ryan is now 8 years old. He is in a regular class setting in the 2nd grade, in Cub Scouts with our neighbors, goes to church in a typical setting and participates in almost every community event we have. I never would have thought all of that was possible when we first heard the word "autism." Ryan even paved the way in his last school where he was the first person with autism to be included. We faced lots of opposition at first, but they ended up falling in love with Ryan and he ended up teaching a lot of people what acceptence means.

I've found that as the years go on, it has gotten a lot easier to advocate and stand up for what is right. Someone pointed out to me this week that Ryan also has the drive to stand up for himself. He may not say it in so many words, but he knows what's right and he lets people know when it is not. We recently went through a battle with his school to have a teacher changed because she wasn't treating him with respect. He had behaviors only with her which was Ryan's way to say, "Hey, you can't treat me like that." I'm not sure that would have been the case if we kept Ryan tucked away when we first heard the word "autism."

In the five years since I first heard you, I have never forgotten about that green apple being more like the red than different. That green apple changed so much of my thinking. I've found that it's easier to balance what we should do for Ryan, what kinds of things to enroll him in and how far therapy should go when I look at him as a boy first and label last. I've found that it is okay to have him in some therapy as long as he enjoys doing it, but I need to be sure he has opportunities to be a child first..

And not only did it change mine and my family's life, I'm seeing it take hold in a friend's life who just heard the word "autism" and lost hope. She's now beginning to see her son as a boy rather than a label, and is allowing dreams for him to stay and not fade away.

It's amazing to see how much the People First Language movement has picked up steam in the last few years. I'd really love to hear the mainstream media using it more, but it will get there. With today being World Autism Day it is my goal to show that my son may be a green apple, but he is more like a red one than different....that is what autism awareness about when it comes to our family!

One other thing I'd like to say that pertains to your BraveHeart name. I don't remember the story behind that, but I remember you touching on it when you spoke. I purchased your Disability is Natural DVD then and on it you signed, "Lead with a brave heart." I'm guessing that must be your signature line. And I wonder how often you think about how many people that line has touched. You probably sign it so fast without much thought, but the impact it has afterwards really is big. I've kept the DVD on my desk, next to my computer for these five years. And in that time I've looked at that line, along with the apple basket, and it speaks to me every time.Things can become very  tiring and discouraging at times, but it is very encouraging to know others have gone on before me and now it is my turn. Reading that line tells me someone believes in me and that I'm not the first person to step out and stand up!

I wanted to share all of this with you from one mom to another. We all need to hear how we are making a difference and that what we do matters. When I hear how what I've said or done has helped someone it pushes me to keep on going. And it reminds me that I should do the same to those that have touched me. Thank you again for how you've changed my way of thinking.

Amy Wallace